Hope's Haven: Squishy body love
Let’s talk body positivity.
As a gal who had an eating disorder back in the day, when my boyfriend was a big ol’ gym lad n I felt I had to keep up, and when my stomach was my worst enemy, I get what I’m talking about. It’s hard though. Yeah sure, I don’t calorie count anymore or run every day, nor do I wear outfits that I’m uncomfortable in, but the road to recovery isn’t always an easy one.
I’ve had days where I’ve felt like a bloody queen, strutting my stuff in a crop top or tight dress, for SURE! Not all days are like that though. Some days, you’re sat on the loo and you look at your thighs or your rolls and just want to flush yourself away because there’s no way any amount of effort can rid you of the feeling of hating your body. I’m not sure how I got over it, to be honest. I’d love to give you an answer or an easy way out but I’m really not sure there is one. The thing I think about the most whenever I start to relapse is the fact that I’ve actually only got one body. Not two or three to choose from but actually just the one. Hating it is completely useless. Sure, I could change it by going to the gym or eating differently and that might make me happy and for some people it does. I really admire those people but the dedication in my brain is in no way devoted to that cause. Sometimes I wish I could be that driven to making my body the epitome of physical fitness but for me it was more damaging than anything else.
Did you know cellulite is genetic? I KNOW. LIFECHANGING. It’s just generations of incredible women in your family who lived in their bodies and got a bit wobbly over time and then passed their amazing wobbliness to you. Cellulite, rolls, loose skin, uneven skin tone, all the rest aren’t reasons to hate yourself but just ways your body exists. If you think about it like that, you owe your body a big thank you.
We’re only on this planet for a little while and imagine if you got to the end and your grandchildren or your friend’s grandchildren ask you about your life and all you can say about it is that you kept on top of your figure? I don’t know about you but I’d quite like to be a squishy old woman with loads of good stories. Who knows, there could be physical marvels out there who have just as many good stories, but I’d hate for exercise to be my everything. That’s just me. All I’m trying to say is that I think whatever makes you happiest in life is what you should do. I know that seems like a trivial thing to say but I really do believe in it. Whether that’s eating cake for breakfast or doing a half marathon every three months or somewhere in between, it’s all good if you’re happy. Everyone is different and what we need is just for us to decide. Our bodies already carry us through a lot of nonsense every day, so we shouldn’t add more nonsense by believing that they need to look a certain way to do that.
Big love and even bigger love to your bodies,
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